Slow motion replay

More cliches of me:

Getting older just leads to more frustrations.I used to look forward to this time of the year. Now it's just another day. No more cake, presents, and people who care.Two years left to of my prime. Looks like I won't get fed today, for the first time since 1996.

I'll take things a day at a time, one step at a time from now on, I hope.
"There is no burden heavier than that of a great potential" -Linus Van Pelt

Anyway:

Remember when I wrote that food tastes like food again, well. Here's what I had for late breakfast, at 2:00 in the afternoon: Sunny side up egg, 3 pieces french toast with honey and butter, chicken nuggets, and fried potatoes. Awesome! It didn't taste like fatty or watery like it does during school days! And, I felt it go all the way down!

Moreover:

Fun stuff from when I first quit school. Some people used to understand. I hope they still do.

Parts have been edited to ensure animinity.*


Hi.
Thanks for the e-mail. I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I've got no
troubles. Just a minor brush with death (it's a long story) and a minor
emotional unstability. Finally remedied it. Talk to you about itsometime
soon.
Sorry about yesterday. I wasn't able to have a convo with you.I had to talk
to __ about something. We put our relationship to an end. Don't worry.
_____'s all right. But it'll be kinda hard to get over it. But part of me
feels happy, not because of ending it with __, but because there were no
grudges against each other. I'll surely miss him. But...oh well, things like
that happen. I'll move on. He will too.
I don't have any trouble keeping those decaying bodies. I bought a lot near
our house and I just dump 'em scums there. It was a great pleasure seeing
'em beg for their life, as I mercilessly torture 'em--like torturing
surpassed what torture really is, accompanied by a sinister laugh and an
evil glint in my eye.
Like I said, the whole fucking educational system doesn't make any sense at
all. It's just one way for people, as "teachers", get employed and have a
mimimum wage to keep them alive. Not only that, it's also a way to milk
money from suffering parents just to keep their gago kid in school and cross
their fingers in agony as their kid experiences what college has to offer.
Offer what? Offer pure b.s.!
Getting educated, according to schmucks, is a stepping stone for an
individual to build his life, but ends up pitying his own self for wasting
all that time, money, energy, and miraculously surviving all those incessant
boring blahs by those "teachers". "Teachers" aren't really teachers. They
really don't wanna teach. They just "teach" just for them to have a job.
After he "graduates", he sees himself scouring through a ton of classified
ads and looks for a "job" to keep feeding himself 3 times a day. Next thing
you know, you'll see his name in the papers, not in the Business section
where all "successful" schmucks brag about their "success" stories, but in
the Obituaries--died not because of natural death, but of insanity. Tsk,
tsk. Poor damned soul.
What do I wanna be when I'll grow up? Man, I already grew up as a worhtless
piece of shit. Seriously, I plan to take up Law, or continue getting myself
tortured in BS Psych, and pursue that Doctorate thingy (as Psychiatrist).
But I prefer Law. Those choices are the safest ways to get a salary. At
least it's self-employed. All I hafta worry about is how to get a client.
But ppl kill everyday. I hafta defend 'em. Or...ppl get insane everyday. I
hafta make them even more insane. Ha-ha!
What is hakkyoku?
______ guy--forget about him. Long story. Don't suspect that I'm interested
in him. Just so you know, I'm not.
This is my reply.
Hope it's not too long.

Same ol' same ol' weirdo,
_____

----- Original Message -----
From: Jovic Maru
To:
Sent: Saturday, July 24, 1999 12:01 AM


> Hey!
>
> Belated happy birthday(was it on the 16th or the19th? Whatever)
> You o.k. now,hope you got no troubles(if you got any problems on where to
> hide bodies I can help you there,if you killed dem yet)
> My life is goin better now that i'm not going to school,i have developed
> lightning quick gaming reflexes and life does not bother me that much.That
> brings me back to the question what does school really do to yer life?,i
> mean if it's that important why dont they start makin skools fpor specific
> reasons,Fuck school It cost me an apprenticeship at star cafe! Hey what do
> you really want to be when ye grow up.all I wanna do is learn
> hakkyoku.WHoops drifted of back there,anyway,yes i do know that _____
> guy
> ,what about him?
> Oh well hope this is not too long.
>
> Later
> WHo else?

*She is so great!