Stuff and junk from my world view that finds an outlet in written form. My own personal hell shared with you. For your infotainment. All activity is performed without adult supervision.

Monday, April 12, 2010

I Hate the Discovery Channel.

What's there to really "Discover"?
All I discovered is I really dislike baldies.

Man vs Wild:
So does Bear Grylls really expect everyone can do things the way he does? Needless "survival" techniques. Eating poop. There was this one time he found apples in a bear's poop. Here's a real skill Bear, look for the tree the bear got the apple from. Anyways just show us ways to make fire and we're good, OK? I learned more from Ray Mear's 30 minute, 8 episode shows then from 3 seasons of this guy.

Mythbusters: BALDY ALERT!
Could they bust the myth that Adam and Jaime are not gay for each other? Some "scientists" they are, everything seems to be trial and error. All I want to learn from them is is it really impossible to herd cats? BALDY ALERT!

What does one really discover when slowing things down? So much yakking about how the stuff they do is scientific. All they really want to know is: "Does it look cool in slow-mo?"

Doing da Vinci.
Just make the damn machine! Nobody cares for your drama.

Futureweapons: BALDY ALERT!
Low talking baldy. Talks about weapons that are already here. Futureweapons of today!

Fight Quest: another baldy? BALDY ALERT!
2,2,2 baldies in one show! The drama queen is going bald anyway. They go to all the wrong places to learn all the wrong martial arts. Example the place to learn Silat is Malaysia. Go to Mexico to learn Lucha, not boxing. Go to brazil for Capoeira (the more popular one) not Jiujitsu. And the Visayas, not Manila, to learn Filipino martial arts(kalis eskrma). I was real humiliating when the drama queen was put through some stupid hazing ritual and forced to shout "Kali!"

River monsters :
Nobody cares "how" you catch the fish. Just tell us what you're looking for, catch it and show it to us. Nobody wants your drama.

Survivorman: BALDing ALERT!
Drama, drama , drama.

About Asia specials:
China, China, fucking China.

The Colony:
Here's how to survive in a Post Apocalyptic world: Become the raiders yourselves. Establish trade with people you've raided. Rebuild government. Make laws.
Here's how not to survive: Drama.

Theres so much more I hate about this channel's programing I'll continue later.


Sidenote:What I also hate on the National Geographic and History channel. Hitler. I really hate this guy. So many shows on this fucker. Its almost all they talk about on these channels. Hitler this, Hitler that. I so hate Hitler. Not so much for what he did. It's more for how "historians" never shut up about him.


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